Google How Old Am I?

Person looking confused.

“Google if I was born July 1967, how old am I?” Why would I ask Google such a question? Can’t I do simple subtraction? Yes, I can, however, I didn’t trust the answer that I came up with. The answer is 58. I am 58 years old. How can that be? Honestly, last time I checked I was 56. How did I forget how old I am?

Prior to my grandparent’s death, my grandfather started off older than my grandmother then somehow as time went on, he ended up being younger. I chalked up my lapse in memory to age like my grandfather. When I mentioned to my partner that I legitimately forgot my age, he said it’s because I’m living a good life. His comment didn’t make sense until I started to write this piece, but he is absolutely correct.

Celebrating the day of my birth has and continues to be a joy for me. My mother tells the story when I was very young if someone would ask me when my birthday was, I would say “July 5th - daddy gonna buy me a bicycle- July 5th.” Add to the mix the 4th of July fireworks and I felt like everyone was celebrating my birthday with me. However, as I grew older, I felt the weight of the years. When I hit the big 50, amazing changes were happening in my life and my outlook lightened. I declared that I am only halfway through this human experience, so there was no rush, and I still had a lot to do. The last time I openly declared my age I was 56, or at least I thought I was. So, what happened to those two years?

My focus for November is to remind everyone how important it is to be kind to ourselves. Did I really lose two years? No, I did not but I could have gotten concerned that I somehow forgot them. My reaction to this realization was awe, followed by humor. I didn’t scold myself or call myself forgetful. What I did was laugh, because honestly, it’s funny.

As my partner said, I am living a good life. Yes, I am. Granted there have been times that were more stressful than others but every morning I am able to wake up and appreciate a new day. Living a good life doesn’t mean everything is lollipops and butterflies. What it does mean - to me - is that I don’t take life too seriously anymore. When I did in the past, there was a lot of fear. Fear of making mistakes, doing something wrong, not reaching my goal. And with that seriousness and those fears, I would treat myself poorly. Allow my inner critic to scream at me, call myself names, feel shame or let doubt rule my life. Being more kind to myself, by finding the humor in my “mistakes” or “failures” means that I am cutting myself some slack or giving myself grace. Don’t think I am making excuses. What I am doing is being compassionate, considerate, generous, and respectful to myself. Treating me like I treat others.  

So, if you forget your age, where you put your glasses - even though they’re on your face - or try something new and fail miserably, remember to be kind to yourself. There’s only one you and you’ll walk with yourself for a lifetime. Why not make that journey as wonderful as it can be by giving yourself the love and kindness you deserve.